Tuesday, March 17, 2009
'Pretend you are God,' she said
Melía had logged a lot of hours in church programs by Saturday evening, and for a girl who loves to interact so much that she won't even watch movies, she'd been extremely good about it.
But midway through the evening, she was cradled in my arms and ready to make conversation.
"Are you God?" she whispered.
"No, silly Melía. I am not God."
"You are like God. Did you make yourself?"
"No, God and my mommy and daddy made me." (So far when I 've said this, no one has asked, "How." Mercifully.)
She decided to have some more fun with this, saying, "You are God!"
"Silly sweet Melía, I am not God."
"Pretend you are God," she conceded.
I started to kiss her all over the cheeks and hair, saying, "I love you, Melía. I love you, Melía."
"No, pretend to be God," she said again.
"I am." I went back to my face-kissing.
"No, you're not," she giggled.
"Yes, I am. This is what God is doing right now. He's loving you."
It kind of blows my mind to consider that every child makes that request of her parent. Every baby looks to his father and mother to play that impossible role. "Pretend to be God," their hearts cry out.
I think I got it right in that moment, for once. It's harder of course, to play the part of God with fidelity when the girls are screaming and fighting and whining and hair-splitting.
Is it harder for God to play Himself at the times when we're doing the same? Or is mercy-triumphing-over-judgment the only role He knows?
God, give me grace to portray You with some semblance of accuracy. May Melía know by my example that whatever else You may be doing, above all else You're loving her.